THE GREAT ESCAPE – The Happy Buddha

Another waking up early to see if our flight was cancelled, yes KLM list 6 that are definitely cancelled ours to Lima is one of them………. So at 6am in the morning back on the phone to KLM China , after 20 mins we can change our flight , the earliest we can have is Friday, this is cutting it tight …. We really want to go to Machu Picchu and we are scheduled there for Sunday, this is our last chance, if this flight gets cancelled then really there is no reason to go, and then our preferred choice would be to go down to Switzerland see Mumso in Bern and then Italy for a week and come back to Amsterdam for the flight back to Beijing. E mails are sent to family and our handling Agent in the UK, tell them of our revised plan.

On arriving back from breakfast there is a missed call and then an e mail from the handling Agent in the UK, KLM has a flight out of Schippld at 13.45 to Panama and the we could get a connecting flight from another airline to Peru…….. it is now 10.30 (T-3.15).

The “Overnight” hotel suddenly broke into a true ops room, chief comms officer Major Penfold, was aided by Private Paddington and resident babel fish Sunders of the now lower 5th, , Major hit the redial key to KLM China, ………. Operation Panama Jack “The Great Escape” started ……..

The Major handled UK telecoms and the PC (well one has to do facebook updates), Sunders was charged with dealing with all foreign comms and logistical packing, Private Paddington was just too excited that he may get the chance to see his auntie promptly fainted, dammm we forgot to bring a marmalade sandwich up from breakfast…….

Time is now ticking T -3.00, phone lines are hot, multiple calls are in progress, Sunders is rearranging the KLM leg, can we get on the flight to Panama …….. minutes tick by … yes, a shout from across the room

S: Penfold we can get on

Penfold (P) on the phone to UK handling agent: yes we can get on, can you arrange Panama – lima leg

Handling agent: yes, there are seats I will book now for you

P to S: it’s a go go … change the flights

S to KLM china: yes change the booking , send us e mail confirmation

Private Paddington is still out at this time dreaming of marmalade sandwiches

KLM China to S: I have changed your flights to go to Panama today flight leaves at 1.45pm, I will send e mail confirmation but it may take an hour …….

The IT may take an hour and us living in China should have sent a warning signal to us …..

Sunders jumps onto internal hotel phone: we want to check out now and we want a taxi

Reception: a taxi will be here in 15 mins and we will make the bill up for you …….

Paddington wakes up and is promptly pushed back in the bag amongst the undies ……

I am now thinking shit ….. I was getting used to another few nights in the dam ……. Now suddenly we are going to another country and if Interpol is monitoring us, they may think we are drug runners …. Amsterdam – Panama – Peru … lets hope we don’t get diverted to Columbia !!

T- 2.15 Bags packed in less than 10 mins, straight to reception …… woahhhhhhhhh where did these people come from ? a line of around 30 people all queuing to be checked in … how ? just how ? there are no incoming flights where did these people come from ? Sunders bowls to the front of the queue, she may be small but her words are deadly ……..

S: we want to check out

Girl at front desk: look there is a big queue

S: We have to catch a flight and a taxi is waiting for us

Then came the lawyer stare over the glasses…

Woman backs down: we have your details, go and catch your flight

After running through the lobby, bags are in the back of Ahmeds cab and we are off in reverse, T – 2.00

After some “delft’ or was it deft driving by Ahmend who was trying to arrange the delivery of his new T mobile sim card to his mother in laws at the same time, and some minor driving illegalities, we get to Schipold, and the after trying the automatic check in …… we both fail, so join the snake T -1.45.

At last T- 1.15 we arrive at a counter, ahrrr there is a problem ? counter dude guy (cdg) says

S: trying her best over looking the glasses routine: a problem

Cdg: yes I will get my collegue here to help , she is a ticket agent

After a lot of dutch words and sunders translating for me, it appears we can’t fly into Panama without a ticket going out and it has to be booked by KLM !!!!!!! and China KLM have not confirmed our flights, and then T- suddenly changes….

Cdg: you have to get your UK ticket agent to talk to KLM china …..

Ho le fook I thought ( and no that was not Cantonese) this is never going to happen

Cdg: oh and check in for your flight closes at 1.08pm

A quick look at the watch I am not wearing it is 12.40 now it is T- 0.28 !!!!

Comms out, phone calls to UK handling Agent and KLM China.

OK Ground UK handling Agent sends over a e booking ref number for the leg from Panama to Lima

We go back in queue T – 0.16 and someone is in front of us …………

T – 0.10 we get to counter

S: here is our e ticket number for Panama to Lima

Cgd calls over to Kewl ticket handling guy (Mr kewl) ( this guy is cooler than the Ice man Bergkampl)

S: we have an e ticket number it is here

Mr Kewl: I can see that

S: but do you want the numbers

P: Sunders he has access to the ticket system he can see the ticket on his screen

Mr Kewl and Cdg talk in dutch, sunders translates to me

We needed to have the tickets both organized through KLM,

T -0.02

Mr kewl is writing out hand written tickets as you can’t fly to Panama on an e ticket

Mr Kewl some how fudges the ticket system so it appears both legs of the flights are booked via KLM

It is now T zero !!!!!

Mr kewl walks off saying he has earnt his salary today !!!!

Cdg …. Don’t worry I have phoned ground handling you are on the flight, I have asked for permission it is now T +0.05 !!!

The race is now on through passport control, where the woman in front with a baby is discussing the problems of travelling with small children and how their passport pictures never look like them, and run … why oh why is our gate at the furthest end of the terminal ?

We get there … through security and then running towards the airbridge we hear the word SUNDERLAND being shouted out ……

We turn round , people are walking towards us …. I am thinking what has the squeaky clean sunders done ?

My heart is already racing …. As we walk towards the uniforms ….

Uniforms: do you have a ticket ? a piece of paper for me ?

Phew all they wanted was Mr Kewls hand written ticket !!

Finally we board, we have escaped the ash ……

What a few hours that was …. But I must say with the exception of the Head of Baggage (Sunday afternoon shift) the people of Amsterdam and staff of KLM have been really great, never have I experienced such kindness and calmness in the face adversity, they are genuinely nice people. Well done KLM and Amsterdam.

Mr Kewl the Ticket Agent and Checkin Guy dude thank you so much ……..

Sunders of the lower 5th looking very pleased with herself after geting on a near empty flight to Panama

So as I sit here on route to Panama I am wondering what else is going to happen when we arrive in Gun City …

Two hours later ……..

Seems the wind gods are against us, as due to strong head winds the flight is taking longer than expected and we are due to arrive a minute after our connecting flight leaves for Peru.

Arrive in Panama, to find that we have been transferred on to a later flight, so an hours wait and we are off on a 3 hour hop from Panama to Lima … which was to be our destination last Friday.

At last!!!! after a five day delay we are in Lima, its warm well no hot and humid rather like Hong Kong, its 12.30am, our Lima Ground Handler meets us and takes us to the hotel which is a mare 20 metres from the arrival hall……

Welcome to Lima …… now I check you into your hotel and will meet you at 7.30 am ready to take you to the airport for your next flight to Cusco tomorrow morning… everything is arranged for you in Cusco.